Why Real Intimacy Begins Where We’re Willing to Look
Lately, I’ve been reflecting on the hidden spaces between couples — the places we don’t name, but always feel.
The shadow.
The moments of silence after conflict.
The subtle withdrawal or tight smile.
The longings we don’t speak aloud for fear of disrupting the fragile peace.
Or the love that feels out of reach, not because it’s gone, but because it’s buried.
In my work with couples over the years, one thing has become clear:
The shadow doesn’t mean something is broken. It means something is waiting.
When we meet these parts — the unmet needs, the projections, the tender wounds we inherited or absorbed — we begin to move from reaction to response, from defence to connection.
Real intimacy begins there.
Not in perfection.
Not in “fixing” each other.
But in the brave act of showing up — truthfully, vulnerably, and with heart.
Love Without Illusion
Relationships are initiatory. They ask us to evolve.
But in the busyness of life — especially for high-functioning couples, parents, and professionals — we often don’t have the space to breathe, let alone reflect. We spiral into the same arguments. We start living beside each other instead of with each other.
I created Meeting the Shadow in Love because I know what’s possible when we pause long enough to truly listen — not just to our partners, but to the parts of ourselves we’ve exiled in the name of being “good” or “reasonable” or “strong.”
This is the work:
To slow down.
To remember why we came together.
To let the walls soften, even if just for a weekend.
A Gentle Invitation
If you and your partner are longing to reconnect — or are at a threshold moment in your relationship — I invite you to join me this September for a two-day couples workshop in North London.
Together, we’ll explore:
Transforming unconscious patterns and protective dynamics
Practising co-regulation and relational repair
Reigniting emotional and erotic intimacy
Shadow work, body-based healing, and the sacred pulse of relationship
And we’ll close with a restorative sound bath, guided by Kasia Marzec, to anchor the experience into your nervous system and your heart.
For couples ready to love more truthfully, not more perfectly.
21–22 September 2025
Highgate, North London | Limited to 6 couples
Learn more & register here
Start Your Journey to Deeper Connection
